please kill me.

god, i hate the gym. but, as it turns out, i hate dieting even more and unfortunately, i was not blessed with the "skinny asian girl" gene. ok, before everyone starts rioting over how delusional i am to make that statement.. hear me out. i've experienced a place where about 90% of the girls weigh about a buck five, if that. this elusive spot is also known as the "asian nightclub". if you're asking yourself why i subject myself to this, i don't know. i'm asian. i have asian friends. that's where we used to go. and who knows, maybe these girls work out 2 hrs a day, 5 days a week but they aren't fessing up. so my only conclusion is that they were born with the natural inability to absorb calories. that or they have a mean meth habit.

in any case, i am not the owner of either choice A or B so my only options are to either eat raw vegetables (forever) or work out to offset all of the delicious fatty calories. i tried the raw veggie thing and it's not for me. i was pretty miserable for 2 weeks living off of tomatoes and gum, only to gain it back in one pathetic weekend of what i thought was more healthy than fast food (restaurant sandwiches.. are not) and carne asada fries (definitely not). what the eff, right? so now i'm eating what i want (yay tacos!) in moderation along with my still healthy weekday lunches and then trying to work it all off in 40 minutes of frenzied uphill power walking. i am very much the opposite of "in shape" so my knowledge of what works is very limited.